How to explore it with confidence (and maybe a little fun on the side).
Remember the first time you touched yourself?
Did it feel curious… awkward… exciting?
Or maybe it came with guilt—even if no one ever said it out loud.
In South Africa, especially among women 35 and up, many of us grew up with one clear message: “Don’t talk about it. Don’t do it. And if you do – don’t admit it.”
But let’s be honest. That message doesn’t reflect who we are anymore.
Self-pleasure is normal, healthy, and something most people do—even if they don’t talk about it.
So why are we still carrying shame?
Let’s Get Real: The Double Standard Is Tired
You’ve probably heard it (or thought it):
👉 “It’s normal for men.”
👉 “Women who masturbate must be freaky, desperate, or doing something wrong.”
But here’s the truth:
Most people explore their bodies during adolescence. It’s part of how we grow.
The difference is, men get a free pass. Women? We get told to stay quiet.
It’s time to change that. Why? Because self-pleasure isn’t just about sex—it’s about self-knowledge, confidence, and wellbeing.
Self-Pleasure = Self-Discovery
Whether you’re single, partnered, or somewhere in between…
Getting to know what feels good is a powerful form of personal power.
It can:
- Boost your confidence in the bedroom
- Help you sleep better
- Lower stress and anxiety
- Release endorphins (hello, happy hormones)
- Even relieve physical pain
And perhaps most importantly – it helps you understand your body and your desires, so you can communicate them better in any relationship.
➡️ Quick question: How is your partner supposed to know what you like… if you don’t?
Why It’s Time to Normalise the Conversation
Talking about masturbation doesn’t make you weird.
It makes you brave, self-aware, and part of a growing wave of women who are rewriting the rules.
Imagine if:
- Self-pleasure was seen like meditation or gym time
- We taught our daughters that pleasure isn’t shameful
- You gave yourself permission to explore, without guilt
Sounds good? It starts with small steps. Like this article. Like you, reading it.
Ready to Level Up? That’s Where Toys Come In
Whether you’re curious or experienced, self-pleasure can be even more enjoyable with the right toy.
Think of it like this:
Some nights you want a deep conversation. Other nights? A little action movie.
Pleasure works the same way. A toy isn’t a replacement—it’s an invitation to explore more of what makes you feel alive.
👉Explore Allure’s beginner-friendly toys
👉Not sure what to pick? Book a private consult with our team
👉Prefer something subtle? Start with a discreet option here
There’s No “Right” Way
Whether your routine involves candles and playlists, or just five minutes of peace before bed – it’s all valid.
You deserve to feel good. Without apology. Without shame.
And we’re here for it. Always.
🖤
—The Allure Team
P.S. Want help figuring out what suits your vibe? Drop us a message or visit our shop. We’ll guide you gently and judgment-free.
